feifei777 发表于 2024-6-13 14:11   全显示 1楼
篇幅的长度令人很喜欢！
支持新作者出现！加油
感觉男女主的感情铺垫描述还有些欠缺，显不出两人为何会爱的很深。
至于男主的绿帽倾向也有点来的生硬，和妹妹的感情描述倒是不错了~
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  • 逍遥夢 金币 +4 认真回复，奖励！ 2024-6-13 15:10
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